Postpartum Anxiety: The Most Common Complication of Childbirth No One Talks About

When most people think of postpartum mental health, they think of postpartum depression. But did you know that postpartum anxiety is actually even more common?

It affects about 1 in 5 new moms, and that number may be even higher, since it’s often undiagnosed. Unlike postpartum depression, it’s not something most doctors routinely screen for, which means many moms are suffering silently, unsure if what they’re feeling is normal, and afraid to say it out loud.

Let’s change that.

What Is Postpartum Anxiety?

Postpartum anxiety is part of what we call Perinatal Mood and Anxiety Disorders (PMADs),  which are the most common complications of childbirth. These disorders can show up during pregnancy or anytime in the first year after birth, and they affect moms across all backgrounds.

Where postpartum depression might look like sadness or detachment, postpartum anxiety often shows up differently:

• Constant worry that doesn’t go away

• Racing thoughts, often worst-case scenarios

• Difficulty sleeping even when the baby is asleep

• Feeling irritable, jumpy, or on edge

• Intense feelings of rage

• Physical symptoms like a racing heart, dizziness, or nausea

• Intrusive, unwanted thoughts (sometimes scary or upsetting)

• Trouble relaxing or sitting still

• A need to control things or do everything “right

• Feeling overwhelmed by decisions (like where or how baby naps)
  

And here’s the part that’s hard to admit: a lot of moms with postpartum anxiety feel ashamed of how they’re feeling. They might look like they’re functioning on the outside, packing lunches, changing diapers, showing up to appointments,  but inside, they’re drowning in worry, guilt, and fear.

Risk Factors

Any mom can develop postpartum anxiety. But certain factors can increase your risk:

• A personal or family history of anxiety

• Traumatic birth experience

• NICU stay

• A high-pressure or perfectionistic personality

• Sleep deprivation

• Lack of social or emotional support

But it can happen even without any of these. You don’t need a reason. And you don’t need permission to get help.

What to Do, And What Actually Helps

First, know this: postpartum anxiety is temporary and treatable. There are ways through it. According to Postpartum Support International (PSI), here are five important pieces of recovery:

1. Education
   Understanding what’s happening helps reduce the fear. You’re not broken. Your nervous system is overwhelmed, you’re undergoing an enormous emotional and physiological transformation, and you need support.
   

2. Sleep
   This is one of the biggest contributors to anxiety. If you can get even a little more rest, whether it’s one extra hour or one night a week of help, it can make a big difference. Ask for help. It’s not weakness, it’s self-preservation. My biggest advice here is try to go to sleep as soon as the baby goes down for the evening (even if this is 6:30 or 7pm, as many young babies do their longest stretch of sleep at this first part of the night so you will get your longest stretch as well). It may be tempting to use these evening hours to watch TV, get things done around the house, or get your alone time in, but if you are experiencing postpartum anxiety, using this time to sleep is essential.
   

3. Nutrition
   Eat regular meals, don’t forget protein, and drink water. Blood sugar crashes can spike anxiety. Keep snacks on hand and feed yourself like you would feed someone you love. Cooking is probably not very feasible right now so keep easy, nutrient dense and accessible things on hand like high fiber granola bars, trail mix, bananas, peanut butter, beef jerky, frozen protein waffles, cheese, or even rotisserie chicken.
   

4. Movement
   You don’t need to “exercise,”  just move. A walk around the block, stretching in the kitchen, doing a downward dog in your living room, or dancing with the baby. Movement helps regulate your nervous system.
   

5. Social Support
   You need people, especially people who understand. This could be a therapist, a support group, other moms in a baby music class, or a friend who’s been there. Let someone in. Research shows that one of the most effective treatments for postpartum mood disorders is “non judgmental sharing.” So find someone you feel you can trust and tell them the truth about how you feel, even if it’s just in an online forum. 

Some Real Talk and Practical Advice

If you find yourself obsessing over sleep schedules, stressing about independent napping, or feeling trapped in a dark nursery all day, please know this: it’s okay to let go a little.

Let the baby nap on you. Put the baby in the stroller, the car, or a carrier, and get outside. Take a breath. Eat a snack. Send a text to a friend. Watch a silly show. You’re not doing it wrong, you’re just being human. And each day is new. You both are learning how to do this. And whatever challenge you’re currently facing (feeding, napping, etc.) won’t last forever. Nothing ever does. 

Yes, routines can help. But there is no one right way to do this. Babies don’t need perfect moms. They don’t need perfect schedules or a precise amount of sleep or milk. They just need you — present, loving, and taking care of yourself so you can take care of them.

If the stakes feel impossibly high, that’s anxiety talking. You can lower the bar. Your baby is okay, and you will be, too.

Therapy and Medication Can Help

If anxiety is interfering with your ability to enjoy your baby or feel like yourself, therapy can be incredibly helpful. 

And if your anxiety is severe or not improving with other strategies, medication is a safe and effective option,  even if you’re breastfeeding. Talk to your doctor or a perinatal mental health specialist about what’s right for you. 

You Deserve to Feel Better

You are not overreacting. You are not making it up. You are not failing.

You are a mom who just brought a baby into the world, and that is huge. Your brain and body are adjusting to an entirely new life. It’s okay to need help.

You don’t have to wait until it gets worse. You can start now.

If you’re struggling with postpartum anxiety, you’re not alone. Our practice offers compassionate, evidence-based support for moms navigating the postpartum period. Reach out, you deserve care, too.