What Type of Therapy Is Right for Me? A Therapist’s Guide

A Guide to Understanding Therapy Approaches and Finding the Best Fit

Starting therapy can feel overwhelming. You’re faced with a list of acronyms: CBT, IFS, DBT, IPNB, psychodynamic, each offering something different. You might be wondering: Which therapy is best for me? How do I even begin?

The good news is: you don’t need to figure it all out before getting started. Therapy isn’t about finding the perfect match on the first try. It’s about finding someone you trust and a process that helps you grow.

In this guide, we’ll walk through some of the most widely used therapy models, what they’re best suited for, and how to choose the right approach, and the right therapist, for your needs.

First: The Relationship Matters Most

Research consistently shows that the quality of the client–therapist relationship is the most important factor in successful therapy (APA, Psychology Today). That feeling of connection often matters more than the specific modality used.

So while understanding different therapy types is helpful, the right therapist for you is someone who makes you feel safe, curious, and empowered.

How to Choose the Right Type of Therapy

There are dozens of therapy modalities, each grounded in different ideas about how change happens. Some are skills-based and structured; others are reflective and insight-driven. Some center on the nervous system, others focus on thought patterns or early life experiences.

Before we dive into seven foundational approaches, here’s a quick side-by-side comparison:

1. Internal Family Systems (IFS)

Internal Family Systems views the mind as made up of various “parts,” such as the inner critic, the wounded child, or the protector. These parts developed to help you cope but can sometimes create internal conflict. IFS helps you form compassionate relationships with these parts and heal emotional wounds.

• Encourages deep self-awareness and internal harmony

• Especially effective for shame, trauma, and self-criticism

• Helps build self-compassion by separating identity from behavior

2. Interpersonal Neurobiology (IPNB)

IPNB integrates neuroscience, attachment theory, and the role of relationships in shaping the brain. It focuses on how your nervous system responds to early and current relationships. This approach blends scientific insight with emotional awareness to foster healing.

• Useful for relational trauma and stress-related dysregulation

• Bridges the gap between emotional and physiological healing

• Offers a brain-based understanding of patterns and change

3. Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)

Dialectical Behavior Therapy is a structured, skills-focused therapy originally designed for emotional intensity and self-harm. It teaches tools in four key areas: mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotional regulation, and interpersonal effectiveness. DBT is especially beneficial for people who feel overwhelmed or struggle with impulsivity.

• Builds practical tools to manage emotions and relationships

• Supports individuals with mood instability or self-harming urges

• Combines structure with validation and acceptance

4. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

CBT is one of the most widely studied therapy models and focuses on how thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are interconnected. It helps people identify negative thought patterns and replace them with more helpful ones. CBT is typically short-term, goal-oriented, and backed by decades of research.

• Effective for anxiety, depression, OCD, and sleep issues

• Offers structured sessions with clear, actionable goals

• Emphasizes present-focused problem-solving

5. Holistic and Relational Therapy

This therapy approach considers the whole person, mind, body, relationships, and spirit. It emphasizes connection, creativity, and exploration rather than diagnosis or symptom reduction. Two Chairs suggests this is ideal for those who want a more intuitive or integrative approach to healing.

• Encourages identity exploration, self-trust, and body awareness

• Ideal for people drawn to creative, collaborative spaces

• Values emotional presence over structured techniques

6. Psychodynamic Therapy

Psychodynamic therapy is rooted in understanding how unconscious patterns from the past influence current behavior and emotions. It explores early relationships, defenses, and internal conflicts. This insight-based work supports deep transformation over time.

• Helps uncover root causes of persistent patterns

• Encourages emotional insight and self-reflection

• Ideal for long-term growth and personal meaning-making

7. Attachment-Focused Therapy

Attachment-based therapy examines how early caregiver relationships shaped your sense of security and connection. It helps people navigate struggles around trust, intimacy, and emotional expression. This therapy is particularly helpful in healing relational wounds.

• Focuses on improving emotional regulation and closeness

• Supports reparenting, identity formation, and boundary-setting

• Especially beneficial for those healing from abandonment or chaos

Bottom Line & Next Steps

There’s no single “correct” type of therapy, what matters is what resonates with you. A therapy approach that works well for one person may feel unhelpful to another, and that’s normal. What’s important is finding a model, or a therapist, that supports your healing and growth.

Here are a few simple steps to help you decide what to try next:

• Reflect on what you need right now. Are you looking for coping tools? A place to process trauma? Help navigating relationships or identity?

• Read therapist bios carefully. Look for descriptions of their approach, specialties, and philosophy. Notice what stands out or feels inviting.

• Start with a consultation. Many therapists offer a free call or short session so you can get a feel for their style and ask questions.

• Stay flexible. It's okay to start with one approach and discover that another is more helpful. Therapy is an evolving process—and you’re allowed to pivot.

How to Choose the Right Therapist

Once you’ve considered a therapy approach, the next step is finding someone to walk that path with you. A strong therapeutic relationship fosters emotional safety, openness, and change.

Based on expert advice from Psychology Today, OpenCounseling, and Two Chairs, here’s how to approach the process:

• Clarify your goals: Know whether you want symptom relief, deeper insight, relational healing, or nervous system regulation.

• Pay attention to the first meeting: Do you feel emotionally safe? Does the therapist seem attuned and thoughtful?

• Trust your instincts: If something feels off, it’s okay to keep looking. A strong connection is worth finding.

FAQs: Starting Therapy

What if I don’t know what I need?
That’s okay. Many people begin therapy with general concerns like stress, anxiety, or feeling “off.” A good therapist will help you clarify your goals.

Can I switch therapy types later?
Absolutely. It’s common to start with one approach and transition to another as your needs evolve.

What if I don’t “click” with the therapist?
That’s a valid reason to try someone else. The therapeutic relationship is one of the most important parts of the process.

You Don’t Need to Have It All Figured Out

Therapy doesn’t start with having all the answers, it starts with asking a few honest questions. Whether you’re seeking structure, insight, emotional support, or space to process life transitions, the most important step is simply beginning.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, uncertain, or just curious about starting therapy, you’re not alone. Our practice offers compassionate, evidence-based care tailored to your unique needs and goals. Whether you're navigating anxiety, trauma, identity, or relationship struggles, we're here to help you feel supported every step of the way.

Reach out today to schedule a free initial consultation. Your growth matters, and you don’t have to do it alone.